Seeing something in a new light

Whilst I have never served my country in time of war and have little real family connection to the ANZAC tradition I have a long ‘history’ with the day itself.

As a preschooler I can remember being taken into town to The Shrine of Remembrance on St Kilda Road rugged up in tartan dressing gown and Grosby slippers. As a schoolboy I can recall learning about the birth of the ANZAC legend and the forging of the Nation’s identity in fire on the shores at Gallipoli. I remember learning of my Poppa’s exploits in Papua New Guinea during WWII and how he made a good earn putting his Melbourne City Council skills to good use recycling military leftovers into souvenirs.

In secondary school I felt caught up in the apparent sudden backlash against ANZAC Day and the argument from the Left that the day was less a commemoration and more a glorious celebration of war, white men and the subjugation of women. I know I learned the ‘moratorium’ from driving past anti-war graffiti in the city. This was followed (seemingly overnight but I’m sure the years have dimmed the accuracy of the memory) by a groundswell of fervent devotion as the public came to realise that the last of the original Diggers would soon disappear. It was as if a switch had been flicked and it became something of a pleasant duty to attend a commemorative dawn service on ANZAC Day.

And so it was in this morning’s foggy dawn that my 15 year old and I attended a local RSL service along with some thousand others. No more than ten years ago we would stand three rows from the clock tower with no more than three or four rows of people behind us. We would arrange to meet friends at dawn and have no trouble finding them. Over the years the crowd has grown to the point where the organisers don’t bother asking the crowd to pay their respects after the service so as to estimate the numbers. We took up a spot just off the footpath, two figures in the mist standing in the middle of a ‘people soup’.

Talking to a bloke who must have seen off his 80^th birthday a while back got me thinking about many things, not the least of which was the sacrifices made, the friendships born and the mates left behind. But that’s not for here; I also thought about the way in which many of these blokes will spend the day.

They will play two-up and tell tall tales. They will fondly remember the larrikins and the work-dodgers, the leaders and the lost boys. They will proudly wear their company colours and their decorations but they will not ‘talk up’ their own achievements, nor will they whinge about the privations and hardships they survived. They will do all this – and more – as groups, as teams, as companies and battalions but, more importantly, as comrades. And they will more than likely do it over a beer.

And the beer will more than likely be VB or Carlton Draught. Many were already onto their second or third pony of the stuff at the RSL bar by the time we got back to our car. It will be significant to them. It will mean something. And here’s the thing; for all the discussion and debate and sometimes anger over what many see as a glib or opportunistic promotion by CUB to ‘cash in’ on ANZAC Day with their ‘Raise A Glass’ Appeal and the money it donates to Returned and Services Leagues around the country, it means something.

It may not be what I would choose as my everyday beer nowadays (although there was a long time for which it was) but if I had been able to go back for the Gunfire Breakfast at the RSL and the bloke I had met earlier handed me a foaming pot of ice cold VB, I’d be honoured to share one with him. No doubt as many kegs as there are surviving diggers will be emptied in bars and clubs around the country today and I doubt many will be Strong Belgian Ales or Double Imperial Russian Stouts.

But as you down the next glass of your current favourite craft beer, spare a thought for the blokes who felt it their duty to fight against tyranny and injustice, who gave up a fair bit of their youth and beyond and then returned to rebuild a country where today we enjoy the freedoms so often taken for granted.

Have a look at VB for what it is for so many blokes. It’s a brand, not just a beer. It’s a memory and a sign post and it’s quite possibly what gave them the edge in dire times. Today it is inextricably linked to binge-drinking and bad behaviour, to bogans and bar fights, to cheap-and-nasty. It is called ‘macro swill’ and ‘wife beater’ and it is used as currency when describing the bottom of someone’s barrel. And maybe that will never change for some.

Maybe for one day at least we can look at it fondly, for their sakes. Have a beer today just to be thankful. Even if it’s to be thankful that we have plenty of good beers other than VB with which to toast.

But I’m going to have a VB.

Cheers

Prof Pilsner

VB Raise A Glass Appeal 2010

Beer and Peace

A bit of a reference to the length and complexity of this post but it is something very close to my heart and I can’t just skim over it. Grab a beer, sit back and relax, and let me know what you reckon.

I’ve been thinking about the ‘two-sides-to-a-story’ factor surrounding the continuing argument surrounding binge-drinking and advertising’s role in its promotion.

This year’s VB “Raise A Glass” campaign has exceeded the total donated in last year’s inaugural campaign with $1,281,000 already in the kick. The 1.1 million raised last year came from a combination of direct website driven donations and a marketing promotion whereby $1 from specially branded slabs of VB was added to the total by Foster’s.

This year, as a result of some fairly negative publicity and the refusal of the Queensland branch of the RSL to participate last year, Foster’s moved to distance the fundraising from the notion that a commercial business can have a heart and still make a dollar and made a direct lump-sum donation to the appeal. And here is where it gets a little murky.

To give you a bit of background and the chance to make up your own mind here’s the story.

The Foster’s side;

A dollar from every slab of VB donated to RSL charities. (Changed this year to direct donation)

1500 kegs of VB donated to RSL clubs to sell and raise cash at ‘street level’. (Last year)

A series of six ads featuring returned servicemen ‘raising a glass’ to fallen mates.

A website designed to encourage current and ex-servicemen and their families to post stories about
the Australian experience in war over the last century.

A section on the website where donations can be made online.



The Against side; (with associated quotes and published arguments)

The association of a beer brand with the Raise a Glass appeal this year has raised the issue of binge drinking and its place in Australian culture on Anzac Day. (The Australian, April 2009)

"In recent years, Anzac day has morphed into an opportunity for young (and not-so young) people to get shit-faced and soppily nationalistic, which makes it an ideal target for a big beer company.

"VB's Raise a Glass campaign will no doubt find favour with anyone who thinks binge drinking is an appropriate part of remembering Australians who have served in wars, and it will raise plenty of useful funds for Legacy, but that doesn't make it ethical." (Trevor Cooke, Corporate Engagement Blog)

"People drink to excess because of exactly the message you're pushing on us. Loss, hurt, pain? Raise a glass! Raise another one! "We're giving you an excuse to keep going at it as well. And a warm, fuzzy feeling because a couple of bucks went to a charitable and decent organisation." ( Morgwn Shaw, Digital Art Science blog)

Victoria Bitter's latest marketing campaign — a tie-up with Defence Force charities — has come under fire for exploiting the Returned Services League brand to sell more beer. (The Age April 2009)

In shortened form, that’s the guts of the debate with the key elements of both side’s arguments outlined. The “NO” side contends that beer and ANZAC Day are poor bedfellows, that VB is ‘using’ the RSL to sell a product and that binge drinking is bad.

I can’t help thinking that this is another case of shooting the wrong messenger. I contend that we don’t have an alcohol problem as such – we have a dickhead problem. We have a problem with not enough parents prepared to show a good example to their kids nor to pull them into line when they stray from the guidelines of behaviour in a civilised society.

The argument that beer has no place in a commemoration of Australia’s most significant actions on the world stage rides a bit thin with me as well. Digital Art Science blog uses, among others the point that “Do veterans not struggle with alcohol abuse as they come to terms with the aftermath of their involvement in a conflict? Hasn’t anyone at VB/Legacy’s agency ever listened to Khe Sanh?”

Yeah they do, and I’m sure they have. Is it not OK to provide some money that might end up helping more than one or two of them, even if it means that a large chunk of the population (which doesn’t have a drinking problem) has to donate it? And if you’re going to quote classic Chisel, choose lyrics that help your argument – Khe Sahn references “Speed and Novacaine” not VB and more VB. Just sayin’, that’s all.

I reckon Defence Force chief General Peter Cosgrove sums it up pretty well in one of the ads when he says that he reckons Australian soldiers would hate to be thought of as anything but regular men and women despite having done a job for their country that was nothing short of extraordinary. I reckon they might also have appreciated a quiet beer at the appropriate time and that they might just have cut loose on leave at one time or another. Raise A Glass is as much about remembering them and taking the time to ‘share a beer’ with those no longer around. It certainly DOES NOT glorify war, nor does it encourage, promote or condone idiot drunken behaviour.

And some, on ANZAC Day might just down one too many with their remaining mates at a pub or an RSL (I had more than a few with some of them in Canberra last ANZAC Day) but I reckon they’ve earned it. Does the VB Raise a Glass appeal have a direct causal link to drunken dickhead binge-drinking and violent behaviour as some are suggesting? Hardly. That’s not to say we don’t have a problem – far from it – but let’s not try to solve one social problem by banning a totally and unrelated different social activity.

These are just my thoughts. It nice to think that the freedom to criticise something and the technological means to transmit these criticisms and my ability to pose a contrary position are all the result of the actions of people who went before us and gave up plenty to defend the principals of goodness against evilness.

Thank you to you all. I will ‘raise a glass’ in your memory. And not just on ANZAC Day.

Cheers
Prof Pilsner

2010-05-05

Australia’s Favourite Beer

It’s Australia Day and the papers are full of the usual blab about “change the flag”, “the national Anthem stinks”, and “has anybody heard of the bloke they named Australian of the year?”

Here at Beer Blokes I want to talk about much more pressing issues. I’m all very excited to see which Aussie beers score a mention in The Local Taphouse Top 100 craft beer poll this year (announced later today) and even more excited to see if any of my nominations rate in the top 10 and even, even more excited to see if my entry is the one randomly chosen to score a slab of each of the top 5.
But let’s talk about Australia’s favourite beer, VB, for a minute, shall we? What’s that, Prof, I hear you say, ‘have you gone mad or something and forsaken your craft beer roots?’ Well, no, thanks for asking, I’ll explain in a minute.

Up until the last few years (and for about twenty years before that) VB – the artist formerly known as Victoria Bitter – has made up around a quarter of all beer drunk in this wide, brown land. 1 in 4. That’s a fair chunk of a pretty large market and has seen VB become an iconic brand intrinsically linked to the culture through sporting sponsorships and plenty of advertising. When CUB was trying to drive Foster’s Lager back in the early 80’s it made it an international beer while VB became, arguably, Australia’s first truly ‘national brand’.

So, as I wrote late last year, it was amusing to see the furore created by some seemingly minor changes to this much loved brew among its biggest and most loyal fans. ‘Career VB Drinkers’ as they called themselves were falling over each other to have a crack at the Big House for daring to tinker with their cherished amber nectar. Letters to the editor pages were packed with Johnnos, Blueys, Knackers’s and Shags’s willing to renounce their ‘religion’ and threaten to switch brands because CUB had ‘changed the recipe’, ‘watered it down’ and even ‘switched the beer to XXXX’ as one melon-head claimed.

So, with a little research (very, very little) and a quick e-mail to (SOURCE PROTECTED) who was once a major powerbroker for CUB, then its Craft Brewing arm and now a partner in a very nice craft brewing set-up just south of the Queensland border where lots of backpackers and hippies hang out and whose initials are JC and whose name I won’t mention – I got about three full pages of facts and figures and links to the ATO website and tables and graphs and all sorts of shit. So I’m fairly confident that what I write here is accurate and factual and can’t be argued with in any way at all whatsoever so there.

I’ll save some space here and ‘dot-point’ the facts (which (SOURCE PROTECTED) assures me are all in the public domain if you know where to look) relating to VB.
As a quick refresher, ‘Career VB Drinkers’ claimed that VB had changed noticeably due to (a) CUB trying to save money in tax by lowering the ABV of the beer, (b) By brewing it in Queensland and (c) by altering the recipe.

The VB facts.
• VB, along with many national brands are brewed in breweries all around the country and have been since the walls came down on state based brewing in the mid 80’s.

• The law regarding beer brewing states that a beer has a ‘margin’ of +/- .02% so that a VB whose label states an ABV of 4.9% might be as high as 5.1% or as low as 4.7% - allowable by law. When VB changed first to 4.8% and then to 4.6% more recently, the Career VB Drinker could have been drinking anything from 5.0% to 4.4% - and NOT NOTICED. Until he read a paper past the sports section.

• When CUB drops the ABV by just .01%, it saves tens of millions of dollars in tax allowing it to compete in the beery duopoly that is Australian mainstream brewing.

So, in conclusion, a ‘Career VB Drinker could, for the last twenty years have been drinking VB that was;
• Brewed in Abbotsford, Kent (Sydney), Fortitude Valley (Brisbane), Yatala, Matilda Bay or even Cascade. Although today it is only brewed at Abbotsford and Yatala.

• Could have been anything from 5.1% to 4.4% ABV

• May have had any of about ten slightly different labels


I’ll leave it here for now so that you can digest all these facts and figures. I’m off to have a beer (not a VB) and you might want to do the same.
I will post a follow up with the various reasons for the changes that CUB has introduced and also to look at the various theories regarding why they have done it and what the future might hold. Also, as promised, I have some VBs in the fridge waiting for the lab experiment to see if I can detect any difference in taste.

Cheers and happy Australia Day,
Prof. Pilsner

Moron VB

Sorry, I’ll read that again ... MORE ON VB.

The latest instalment of the ongoing saga regarding Australia’s highest selling beer, Victoria Bitter, is up and running.

In previous posts I discussed the reaction to ‘changes’ to VB by its brewer, Carlton & United Breweries. These changes involved dropping the alcohol by volume level of the beer from 4.9% down to 4.8% last year and then again to 4.6% earlier this year. The uproar has been deafening with a conga-line of self confessed career VB drinkers threatening to switch beers because their favourite brew has turned to something worse than water. Some have claimed the courage of their convictions and have already switched brands.

So now we hear rumours that VB has not just changed its alcoholic strength (by a ‘whopping’ .03%) but has in fact become – DAH DAH DAH ... DAAAAAH!!! – a completely different beer! They reckon it has been switched for the 4.6% ABV Fourex, the flagship brew of Queenslanders! And not just a Queensland brew, but one which is brewed by the company’s brewing rival, Lion Nathan. There may be a small flaw in your theory, there, dickheads.

I have managed to procure two stubbies of VB – one of the old 4.8% variety and one of the new 4.6% beasts. I will conduct a strictly controlled secret experiment (secret because you can imagine the damage to my reputation as a Beer Bloke if I were to be seen drinking VB!) and I will post the results.

Again, wish me luck.

Cheers
Prof. Pilsner

And they say I’m a Beer Snob - Part Two.

Further to my story of the VB Drinkers’ Lament, today’s paper featured a decent write up on the VB change. It followed on from the slab-loads of letters to the editor pissing and moaning that VB had lost the taste that had made it “the best cold beer for a hard earned thirst” in so many successful ad campaigns. And here’s a picture;


With some words ...

Forty years a loyal VB quaffer, Geelong pensioner John Carvill reckons his beloved beer "doesn't have any bite" any more. He now drinks Toohey’s Extra Dry.
"I tolerated the first change (when the alcohol content was reduced by 0.1 per cent three years ago), but they shouldn't have fiddled again," he said.

A few comments, if I may.

1) No Bite? And you’re happy to switch to a double filtered ‘dry’ style beer? Couldn’t afford Carlton Cold? Dickhead.

2) This bloke is pictured emptying a stubby of clear liquid. Either CUB has well and truly watered down VB, or this peanut didn’t even have the plums to waste a bottle of actual, real beer. Dickhead.

3) He ‘tolerated’ the first change – if by ‘tolerated’ he means ‘failed to notice’. There is more than a fair chance that he drank twelve slabs of the new stuff before CUB publicised the ABV change the first time around. Double Dickhead.

Check out the full story, it’s a laugh. Some of these ‘career VB drinkers’ need to swap there beer for a cup of cement and harden the f@#k up!

Cheers,
Prof. Pilsner

And they say I’m a Beer Snob

Dr Lager and I took our families together for a short break in Beechworth, North East Victoria, during the school holidays and the trip has generated about six posts that I’m currently fine-tuning. We were discussing Beer Labels – as in, the terms used to describe various types of Beer Drinkers – when we began a colourful discourse on the difference between a Beer Snob and a Beer Yob.

On my return, I began plodding through five days’ worth of newspapers and was a bit mystified by a series of short letters to the editor regarding an Australian institution of beer, VB. Victoria Bitter, referred to nationally as VB so as to trick interstate drinkers into thinking that the brew is NOT from Victoria, is this country’s top selling beer by volume. In Victoria alone it accounts for 28% of the amber fluid downed in the state.

The letters in the paper were all in the same vein – “I am never drinking VB again”, “ripped off by new VB”, “VB has changed for the worse” – all that sort of thing. There could only be two answers to my query. Either these drinkers had accidentally bought the new VB RAW (low carb VB, just what the beer world was missing) or CUB had suddenly begun brewing VB to a different recipe while we had been away. NO to both the above.

I think I wrote earlier this year about CUB dropping the alcohol level of VB down 2 percentage points from 4.8% to 4.6% a move which saved the company some tens of millions of dollars in beer tax thus preventing the need for a price rise. I don’t want to come across as ‘all beer-knowing’ but I would be happy to lay a fair wad of cash on the fact that most VB drinkers would not be able to taste a 0.02% change in ABV. An even larger wad says that MANY would not know the difference between VB and Foster’s Lager if the bottle wasn’t labelled. That’s no slight on the VB drinkers – it’s just a fact.

Take a photo of your computer screen NOW. I am going out to buy a stubby of VB. That’s right, you heard me, VB. I have some 4.8% VB in the fridge at the restaurant and I will do a side-by-side comparison to see if I can detect any difference.

Wish me luck.

No, seriously, wish me luck.

Cheers
Prof. Pilsner

Some nice beer news

While I don’t want to make light of the dreaded GFC and the effects it has had on many people’s livelihood worldwide, I also haven’t got too sucked into the whole ‘imminent collapse of the whole wide world as we know it’ tin-bangers and their calls of doom. Same for Global Warming – “WHOOOOOOOO, We’re all going to DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE!!!” Call me an optimist.

But today I saw some good news for those ho have been crusading for real causes that affect real people – beer drinkers. It seems that, as a result of the global financial downturn, more and more Australians are staying in instead of going out to dinner. Not great for the restaurant owners who can’t adjust, but there is some good news in it. People staying home to have dinner parties are serving better quality wines and also better beer.

The Herald Sun reports findings of some data or another about sales figures and such which show a big increase in “premium beer” and “bottled wine” sales as well as spirits and a small increase in overall beer sales. I worry a little that ‘Premium Beer’ is what the Big Brewers refer to as premium – mainstream pissy fizz but with silver and gold labels as well as ‘imports’ like Stella Artois (from the small Belgian enclave of Southbank) and Heineken that comes all the way from Camperdown.

Even better was the news that VB sales have dropped by one percent – maybe we are beginning to upgrade a little. I don’t think that this report signals a swing towards craft beer, or even that we are beginning to look for something ‘better’, but maybe it is a small step in the right direction. Premium beer sales are up by 20%, mid-strength by 10% and full strength beer is up by 7% which might just hint at a move towards exploring of the beer world by those who may not have known that anything other than VB and Crown and Toohey’s New existed before.

Today, the premium beer market – tomorrow the craft beer world!!

Cheers
Prof. Pilsner

Raise a Glass

You may have gathered that I am no huge fan of the largely spiritless corporate brewing giants who appear to be in the market for money rather than for the pursuit of beer and beery excellence. Don’t get me wrong – I understand why they do what they do and that there has to be big brewers so we can better appreciate the little guys – I just pay them that much attention.

Which is probably why this promotion caught my eye. It seems that, while it is clearly part of a marketing campaign to raise brand awareness and cement revenue streams, this particular ploy appears to have some element of social conscience and respect for culture and tradition.

The ‘Raise a Glass’ campaign is driven by Foster’s major brand, Victoria Bitter, in conjunction with Legacy and the RSL. The first thing that struck me is that the whole VB branding is almost invisible, set into the site as a subtle understatement rather than a fan-faring ‘look at me, look at me!!’ kind of grandstanding. The purpose of the promotion (apart from shifting units) is to remember and honour those who have served in military conflicts around the world over the past century.

Timed to tap into the ANZAC Day commemorations the program is as much about raising awareness as it is about raising funds. Funds are raised by donations through the website as well as through sales at bars and clubs. RSLs and other clubs will also have kegs of VB donated by Foster’s.

But it is the website and ad campaign that convinced me that there may actually be a heart beating faintly somewhere within the beast that is Foster’s as they both tap into a deeper understanding of the sacrifices and courage of our fallen diggers. The site provides a kind of forum where ex and currently serving soldiers and their families can contribute pictures and stories that will ensure that the events and incidents which don’t qualify for the history books are not lost when the last of these men and women pass away.

For anyone who enjoys a beer and a good yarn and has some sense of the ties that really bind a Nation’s culture, this site is worth a look. And if you can, get out on ANZAC Day and raise a glass to those who fought so that you could have a nice cold beer and not have to ask for it in Japanese or German. Even if it is only a VB.

Cheers
Prof. Pilsner

... and speaking of VB

I got a call from Dr Lager the other day.

“I’m over here in Singapore. Whaddya reckon they charge you for a stubby of VB? In a restaurant? Normal size? Go on, have a guess! You won’t believe it!!”

“I dunno ... twelve bucks?”

“ ......(silence) ...... Yeah? Howdya know?”

Mrs Pilsner and the eldest Pilsner spent a few days in Singapore on the way back from a trip to Thailand and that was one of the first things they relayed back to me. What I hadn’t realised was that there is some kind of official ‘Don’t Drink Beer’ campaign going on in this island state that is very disturbing.

According to Dr Lager, and confirmed when he popped over and we scoured the net together for menus and price lists, even local draught beer is priced so as to deter the average drinker from being able to afford to get even a little bit tipsy.

$38.50 for a jug (1.25 litres or so) of draught beer and $8 for a glass!! What?!? Think about that the next time you are charged ‘over the odds’ for a pint.

I still can’t get over the fact that you can pay $12 for a VB. If I’m paying twelve bucks for VB – which I wouldn’t – I want to see him chaperoned by at least three of his little green labelled mates. I don’t know what’s worse, actually. The fact that someone is charging that much for VB, or the mere fact that VB is available in Singapore.

Fair dinkum, there oughta be a law.

Cheers,
Prof. Pilsner

Our favourite brews

This heading caught my eye in the local Melbourne paper last week. I’m always a little sceptical of beer articles in the mainstream news because they always seem to fall into one of two categories – highlighting and over-exaggerating alcohol fuelled street violence or thinly disguised advertorial for one of the big breweries.

This article fits the MO of the latter and, in this case I think they’ve given a free hit to one of the big beer barons*. It claims to have ‘unearthed’ the most popular beers in Melbourne. And by ‘beers’, they mean Victoria Bitter – VB – and by ‘most popular’ they mean the stuff sold through Melbourne’s largest single beer-barn style retailer – Woolworth’s, which includes Dan Murphy’s cellars and a thousand hotel bottle shops.

We all knew that VB was the single biggest selling beer in Melbourne because, well, it’s the biggest selling beer in Australia – has been since God’s dog was a pup! What we didn’t now was that “the beer we drink does vary according to our postcode,” the article suggested. It then contradicted itself by saying that VB was the top-selling beer in liquor shops IN EVERY STORE SURVEYED IN MELBOURNE AND REGIONAL VICTORIA. Excuse me, but have you seen my ‘variance’??

Well, the only variance comes in when you look at an outlet in the CBD and one in Toorak (Melbourne’s most prestigious address). Here VB comes in at number five and four respectively. But the results for these two are nothing to be proud of either. In the CBD the alpha-beer is Corona. In Toorak it is Pure Blonde. I can understand VB at the ‘top’ because it is so widely available, has been drunk by everybody’s father, grandfather and great grandfather and is supported by the longest running series of ads in print and on radio and TV.

But Corona!?! The greatest practical joke ever played on a beer drinker and possibly the greatest supporter of the citrus fruit growing industry. Pure Blond!?! Pure marketing bullshit! It should have a warning on the label; “MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF BEER. MANUFACTURED IN FACTORIES WHERE BEER PRODUCTS ARE MADE” Any less taste of beer and you’d need to call it ... well, Corona.

Now, in case you think I’m becoming a beer snob (maybe the bulk of the population are just beer slobs??) I’m not, I’m just using these pages to lament the fact that award winning craft beers and imported offerings are never given the sort of full page spread that items, like this, of dubious merit or educational worth seem to get regularly. If you want to make up a full page ad for a big brewer, just say so.

Just don’t pour cheap beer down our backs and tell us it’s raining.

Cheers,
Prof. Pilsner

Beer-trothal

I had a comment posted a week back seeking counsel on an important and delicate issue;

Dear Professor,

I’m getting married next month and I must choose between having Beck’s or James Boag’s Premium as the wedding beer.

Any thoughts?

Thank You, Jason the Architect.

Jason is both blessed and cursed in the same way that many of his predecessors were sublimely oblivious. Going back ten and twenty years when most of our crew were getting hitched, not only were we not given a choice but we didn’t realise that there was a choice. Well, apart from one.

At a wedding you had VB as the table beer in 750ml longnecks and the bridal party had Crown Lagers – sorry, Crownies – during the photo session and in the back room while the guests were being seated. We never drank anything much other than VB and that was just the way it was.

Today the bride and groom are more likely to be offered a choice but for many the choice will be ‘Boring Mainstream Lager A’ or ‘Boring Mainstream Lager B’ or, in Jason’s case ‘Mainstream Lager A’ or ‘Mainstream Lager But Imported A’.

It got me to thinking about what factors come into play when choosing a beer and what that choice says about you and and how you feel about your guests. I suggested to Jason that careful consideration needed to be given as to what your choice of beer says to your guests about what you think of them. So many guests today will be armed with the knowledge that there is more to beer than standard golden mainstream lagers and who know that there is not really a difference between Carlton Draught and Toohey’s New other than the state of origin.

The reality is that most guests will not see a mainstream beer on their table as a slight by you, but that would not have made for a very interesting post, so let’s just pretend that they will all assume that they have offended your family name if they were to be served Carlton Cold. By the way, please, please, please don’t serve Carlton Cold. Even as a joke.

So what does Beck’s ‘say’ to your guests and what is Mr Boag’s reply? The import probably hints at certain perceived levels of quality. Plus, every man and his dog have seen their series of TV advertisements on high rotation lately and will at least know the brand, unlike the wedding guests of a decade back. (That’s a rather sad realisation isn’t it?)

The Beck’s beer with its precision German engineering and inoffensive profile suggests that; “Your company on our special day is thought of highly, we value your friendship and trust you all enough that you will not buy us cheap and shitty gifts from shops whose names end in ‘R US’ or ‘A-RAMA’, that this is our special day and we choose to share it with you even if we think your partner is a bit dodgy and we are betting your relationship won’t see Christmas and that we wish for you to be a part of our lives when we are married”.

James Boag’s Premium Lager is a local version, clean and crisp, easy drinking without being bland – interesting enough to be enjoyable to those with a bit of beer nous but not too ‘boutique’ to make the semi-bogans wish they’d smuggled in some VBs under the corduroy sports jacket that they consider falls well within the definition of ‘Lounge Suit’. It says pretty much exactly the same as what the Beck’s says, but says ‘mate’ at the end.

Cheers,
Prof. Pilsner